i dun get everything that u r trying to say

it seems to mi that you dun get wat im trying to say too



the pt is that:

dun assume i wan to leave you out unless i said it rite in front of u

i nv had the thot of trying to stop u from learning anything of speed's

if it was the choosing of songs to record that made you think so, u r very much mistaken

i kept rejecting the speed songs geline suggusted bcos i thot u will not b interested in sth that seems to b memories of onli eternity and that will make u feel left out

so i reject the speed songs

you always give mi a feeling that u dun like us to mention speed cos its sth that we liked as eternity

when geline and i was watching the vcd for the first time, i suggusted pem recording white love but geline says no cos she feels that this is sth eternity shares and she dun wanna break that memory

wat makes mi unhappy is that you seems to b extremely biased against mi

everything geline does wrong can b forgiven but every little thing i do wrong, i have to b condemned

thats y i nv confide in you

bcos ur actions make mi feel that you will end up judging mi instead of helping mi overcome my sins

that will onli push mi deeper down into confusion and sorrow

so i nv tell you my probs



is there any wrong to dislike misery?

do you love to live in sorrow?

you say i cant tolerate things

at the way you r speaking thru ur blog

it seems that you r not trying to control ur temper too

so we're even?



i dun complain abt you behind ur back

i try my best to protect u

ask anyone

they'll tell you the truth



you seem to b very upset everytime i say the word sian

its juz an expression to mi

it dun mean that i juz complain and do nothing

it means that im trying so hard to do sth that im realli worn out



you say if i continue like this, i will onli hate you more

but im saying this back to you

if you continure like this, you will onli hate mi more

so we're even?



you ask "y dun u juz buck up and stand up on ur feet n tink abt it rather than lament and get angry with mi"

you seem to b doing the same

so we're even?



you say "if u think i am wrong, u cant b right either"

im saying the same to you

if u think i am wrong, u cant b right either

so we're even?



i realli dun remember being scared to tell geline that i like takuya

i personally asked her and she said she knew long ago that i like takuya and i was nv afraid to tell her



the comment that you all were to occupied with ur books wasnt meant to blame you all

sorry if i cant get the msg across



ur words are hurtful not becos it hurts my pride

its becos im innocent of watever you r accusing mi for doing



i find you very synical of all the stuff i said abt loving

i realli do love

but mayb in the way you c it, im doing it wrongly

everyone has diff ways of doing and expressing things

mayb in terms of that, we r miles apart

we we r wrong in each other's eyes



i din mean to twist wat you meant

to mi, that is realli wat you meant

so its either ur expressing prob or my interpreting prob

its both i suppose



i typed this as calmly as i can

im not asking for a fight

but i need time to cool down

dun b angry if i dun go to you during church this sat

i realli need time