i noe i wasnt supposed to read it

but i glanced thru a few lines of it



=(

during this period of time

i cld onli c how much i gave in and sacrificed

ur mentioning of how much u had to suppress ur feelings softened mi

i noe we werent great frens to u when you were sad abt ur i/c and stuff

i think this boils to the way we handles things once again

when i sat down to talk to geline abt this , she kept trying to clown around and joke and to change the topic

it realli irritated mi becos i WANTED to talk abt it

but i c the effort in her

she doesnt realise that i wanna talk abt it

all she noe is that im unhappy due to this and she is trying her best to help mi forget it

we all have very different solutions to problems and very different ways of interpreting stuff

but we all have good intentions

and thats wat realli matters isnt it?

gg back to the content of ur blog

*im saying this not to put blame on anyone but i realli wanna let you guys noe how i feel*

you wasnt the onli one whu had to smile when you dun wan to

many a time i put myself in ur *ur as in all members of pem, not onli u* shoes, and thot for all of u

i kept my problems and the feeling of being left out to myself, giving u guys bright smiles so as not to dampen ur happiness

im sorri i nv thot that you cld b giving too

sometimes things get so hard that my feelings cant b put away and suppressed anymore

it happens to you too doesnt it?

im saying this juz to let u noe that u are not the onli one whu had to sacrifice and so arent i the onli one

ting and sam and geline muz have thot for us and gave all of themselves to help us when we needed help

so mayb its time we *we as in all of us, not onli mi and geok* start to realize that we r not the onli pple trying to hold pem together

everyone's trying



the sermon at church yesterday was like custom made juz for us, dun you feel, geok? =)

i realli had to thank God when i saw wat the message was abt

its something tat we need to have in order to solve this prob once and for all

To be like Christ

it isnt easy

but with God

we can =)



and geok

im tempted to read the rest of ur blog!

can i pls? =P

i wanna noe how u feel

the anger is not in mi anymore

thank God



i told geline i wanna quit pem

i have been thinking abt it mths ago *i was realli gg thru hard times then* but this quarrel realli triggered this thot

she told mi off

she said pem is not onli abt mi and mi and mi

quiting pem has everything to do with each and everyone of you

when sam thot of giving up the dream, i called her selfish *i no longer think so sam, dun worry!*

but i cant c that the moment i think of leaving, im being extra selfish too

geline opened my eyes

and i can c it now =)

thank God



there are so many more that we have to learn

lets all try together

To be like Christ



the Lord provides =D